Fun Conversation From Terrorism Class #3

So here's the scenario from Tuesday night. Its about our old friend Bin Laden.

In the beginning of our Global War on Terror/Struggle Against Extremism/Long War, we started off by saying we were going to kill Osama Bin Laden. I was cool with that. If you're going to kill civilians, then you're not playing by the rules, and you have to go. For years there were constant updates, Bin Laden's in this cave or that, we shot at him, etc.

And then, Bush just kind of stopped talking about him. I thought it was because he launched an inept, horrible war in Iraq, and that quagmire was too much of a distraction. Dr. Combs has her own theory. And when I say its her own theory, its also been written up in numerous, public government reports.

It boils down to this:

If Bin Laden is captured, we can't try him. No one else will try him. Pakistan will blow up if they try him. If we take him to Kansas, the world will hate us more. (How much more can they hate us? Well, somehow my mother does more and more retarded things. I often think, how many more retarded things can my mother do, but she always suprises me). In the end, we can't arrest him and try him.

If we kill Bin Laden, um, people get kind of mad. Once again, how much angrier can they get? Well, how much dumber can my mother get? At least at a theoretical level, there is a higher level of anger/stupidity. Bin Laden's people also don't want him killed, because there would be a power struggle. Its kind of like the mob. Bin Laden goes, and his two or three deputies have to fight it out.

So the theory goes that if Bin Laden is killed...............wait for it...........no one will say a thing. Bush won't say anything, because it will further inflame people. Bin Laden's people won't say anything, because there would have to be a power struggle. So Bin Laden could actually be dead, and if dead, its in the best interest of everyone involved not to say anything.

Now that is some crazy Tony Soprano mafia stuff.

In forty years or so, some declassified file will be released and we'll find out the truth. Of course by then, we'll all be dead from global warming or............BIRD FLU!!!!!!!