Oy Vey

I have a friend who used to be a degenerate. Now he's a fundamentalist Christian. I thought there was a balance between completely unuseful to society and lunatic fringe, but apparently not. Anyway, my friends new religious philosophy can be sumed up thusly........

"Yes I used to sin but Jesus has saved me, and everyone else is going to Hell!"

I don't really think of things in terms of sin. I don't want to get into some huge list of what's wrong and what's right. I don't think being gay is a sin. I'm not a big fan of people who eat pork. I think its limiting to think of God as someone who rains down fire upon those who come up on the wrong end of the sin checklist.

I think we're supposed to work hard and do the best we can. I'm pretty sure that some gay guy who actually helps people is better than some self righteous person who's slept with half of Raleigh. Maybe I'm being selective. I probably am. But I think that it matters how you treat other people, not how well you follow Leviticus.

Anyway, I actually had this conversation with my friend:

Me: So you think everyone else is going to Hell?
Him: Yes. If you don't believe in God, you go to Hell.
Me: Well most of the other religions believe in God. Are the Muslims going to Hell?
Him: Yes. Because they worship Allah.
Me: Um, Allah is just Arabic for God.
Him: Well they worship Muhammad.
Me: No they don't. Muhammad is just a prophet.
Him: Well they're going to Hell.
Me: Okay. That makes sense.

Next conversation.........

Me: So you think the Bible is literal?
Him: Yes.
Me: You know you're eating bacon right now, don't you?
Him: That's not literal. That's the Old Testament.
Me: So the Old Testament doesn't count?
Him: Only what Jesus said counts.
Me: Didn't Jesus die for everyone?
Him: Yes, but you go to Hell if you don't believe in him.
Me: So Jesus is merciful?
Him: Yes.
Me: But he sends people to Hell?
Him: Yes.
Me: So is He merciful or not?
Him: Both.


And here's my favorite conversation. Believe in Hell or don't. Believe in demons or don't. Believe in miracles or don't. Believe in Angels or don't. Believe that God works directly in people's lives or don't. I may disagree or agree with any of those. I don't think poorly of anyone who does or does not believe in any of those things. But do not try to convince me of the need for SUBMISSION.

Me: You know I have a women's studies minor, right?
Him: Its not that women are less. They just need to submit.
Me: So they have to do whatever you say?
Him: No. I talk to her about things, but I make the final decision.
Me: So she has to do whatever you say?
Him: No, its not like that. I'm just the leader. I have my role. She has her role.
Me: And her role is to do whatever you say.
Him: People need to have their roles.
Me: What if she's smarter than you?
Him: That's not the point. She's not less than me. She just has to listen to me.
Me: You're a moron.
Him: No. You're just getting caught up on the word "Submission".
Me: No, you're just a moron.


I will not sit by and accept someone wanting to limit half the population to being submissive, second tier citizens. Marriage is either a partnership or it isn't. Having one person rule and the other submit is not a partnership. It is a dictatorship and it is disgusting.

Don't say submission around me. I will lose my mind. Even more than strip clubs. I know too many smart female lawyers and smart female professors and too many borderline retarded men.

Makes me so angry!