People I could do without

1. Hillary Clinton

2. Sean Glennon

3. People who hate immigrants. Unless your name is Sitting Bull, you immigrated to this country too, jackass.

4. Hillary Clinton.

5. Britney Spears' little sister. Can't the government intervene and sterilize this family? I know they're not poor black women on welfare, but still. (Yes, in fact, we did sterilize poor black women on welfare. USA! USA!)

6. The writer's strike morons. Hey, I'm pro-union, but you guys don't have real jobs. You, um, make up stories. And that's cool, but you should just be happy you're getting paid. Poor writer's! You must have horrible working conditions! My God, some of them must have carpal tunnel! Writer's will now be known as Unuseful Secretaries.

7. Hillary Clinton.

8. Carolina basketball fans. Wow, you beat Kent State! Fantastic! By the way, if you didn't go to a school, and aren't married to someone who went to said school, don't cheer for them. Freakin' Daywalkers.

9. My brother's in laws, who got my niece a singing pig that sings in Chinese for Christmas. I've been known to get children gifts primarily because they make annoying sounds, but do we really need Chinese songs blaring all the time? Isn't Elmo annoying enough? Also, if we're going to hate immigrants, can we stop the mail order bride business? Someone who will deliver my furniture is infinitely more useful than someone who marries a fifty-five year old man deep into his midlife crisis.

10. Hillary Clinton.

11. Hillary Clinton.

12. Hillary Clinton.

13. Hillary Clinton.

14. Hillary Clinton.

15. Hillary Clinton.

Sorry, I had a seizure there for a minute. I feel like Jack Nicholson in the Shining. All work and no play makes me want to blow up the Hillary Clinton campaign bus.