Monday, February 19, 2007

Seasonal Depression, What Fun!

Well, its February 19th, and I officially don't care. About anything.

Not to say I'm not trying. I'm putting forth the effort needed for me to be successful. I am turning in work on time, not doing heroin, positive things like that. But things suck.

For some reason, it seems like my life is always a year and a half away from being good. In a year and a half, I'll be making money! In a year and a half, someone will want to be with me! In a year and a half, I'll have a super cool degree! In a year and a half, it will rain happiness and candy!

And it always seems like its a year and a half away because it always is. I buy into all the nonsense, I really do. I just want to study hard and make good grades and change the world! But the fact is, I've never had money, and probably never will. At least not enough to matter. In a year and a half, I won't be making enough money. In a year and a half, my family will still give me grief. In a year and a half, I will still contemplate plunging head first off the fourth floor of Fretwell in the hopes that I'll receive enough brain damage where I won't have to think about this stuff any more.

But its okay. I'll feel better in a couple of months. And in the summer, I'll convince myself I can be the town manager of some hick community and that everything will be fine. Its easier to believe anything when its warm.

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