About Me

My name is Jeremiah Olson and I am from the great state of North Carolina. I am in the Masters of Public Administration program at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte. I am 22, have ravishingly good looks (when compared to really ugly people) and am only dozens of IQ points away from being a genius. I am a vegetarian but not dogmatic about it. I am a Christian but not insane about it. I like Thai food, pit bulls, Joe Biden, my niece, and the Carolina Panthers. I hate Republicans, George W. Bush, George W. Bush and George W. Bush.

Now for the fun stuff.

I am the middle child of a family of nine (yes, nine is correct, no typo). My mother had three biological children and then decided to adopt. So she adopted six children. Six at risk children. And the state of California (where we were living at the time of this insanity) let her do it. Apparently social services doesn't have a questionnaire or a process or anything. They just want to unload children on whoever will take them.

It's not that my mother was unqualified to raise nine children, its that everyone is unqualified to raise nine children. There should seriously be a limit. And the limit should be three or four. For all of the people who have multiple children, especially Republicans who feel the need to have a kid every year or two, STOP. Its not healthy. Its not good for the kids. Its not good for the parents. Its not good for anyone. Children are not like cats. They need a lot of attention. If you want to have nine cats, feel free. All you have to do is feed them, give them a litter box and give them a Q-tip to play with. If you want to have nine children.....kill yourself. Because you're hurting society and you should be removed from the gene pool. I hope that's not overly harsh. Oh and if you are going to have nine children, please don't do anything cutesy with their names. Like have all their names start with a J. Or have all their names rhyme. Or have all their names be the names of former presidents (yes I have seen all three of these). Once again, if you are one of those people, consider removing yourself from this life or at least removing yourself from this hemisphere.

My father was in the Navy, which provided him a great excuse for avoiding his family. Thanks a lot Dad! One day, he just didn't come home. And he moved to the mid-West, to Kansas or Nebraska or one of those useless states that we commited genocide of the Native American population to get. Glad we killed millions of people. Because we really need all that corn. But anyway, I could think of a lot of very negative words to call my father, but I'll restrain myself. Because of him, I have one area where I agree with Republicans, which I'll talk about in a further posting.

So after my Dad bailed, we moved to North Carolina where my Mom remarried. Because apparently the state wouldn't give her any more kids, so she decided to marry a man with kids of his own. So I got to move 3,000 miles from coast to coast, but I did get a step father. And for anyone who has kids that is thinking about remarrying, don't. Because your kids will hate their new dad or new mom. They just will. "But he's a great guy." No he's not. He's a low quality guy or else he wouldn't be with someone with so much baggage. And if by some chance he was a great guy, why do you want to straddle him with all your problems? The best is when two divorced people with kids marry each other. Its like a failure synthesis. With our powers of failure combined we can ruin for more lives then on our own!

The good thing about my Mom remarrying is I got to move to North Carolina where my friends are. Charlotte is a beautiful, very underrated city. Its also good because I am a liberal in a somewhat conservative state. Which is good, because if I was a liberal in a liberal state or a conservative in a conservative state, I would be completely insane. Because when everyone around you agrees with you, they don't tell you how dumb your ideas are. Thats how we end up with Trent Lott and John Kerry. I'll remind everyone that Trent Lott basically said that the country would be better of with Strom Thurmond, a segregationsit, as president, and that right before the election, John Kerry basically called the troops retarded. Its much better to live in a place with a multitude of ideas instead of a dogmatic belief in a few dumb ones.

Next I'll write about my political beliefs. It will be fun and exciting and will probably annoy one or two people. And if you're annoyed or disagree, please post a comment. I am need of validation or an argument. Please, please validate me.